How to Talk to Your Son About the November 2024 Election Results

Discussing the 2024 election results with your son is an opportunity to help him understand the social and political landscape, while also fostering empathy and awareness for the challenges that women, LGBTQ individuals, and immigrants may face. This is a critical moment to educate young men about the real-life implications of policy changes on reproductive healthcare, LGBTQ rights, and immigrant rights, and to guide them in showing support for those affected. Here’s a guide to navigating these conversations with your son, tailored by age group, with a focus on helping teenage boys understand how to be allies and make thoughtful choices.

Preschoolers (Ages 3–5): Focusing on Simple Ideas of Kindness and Fairness

For preschoolers, it’s best to keep things simple. Focus on general concepts like kindness, fairness, and safety.

Key Talking Points

  1. Basic Fairness and Empathy: Explain that different people have different ideas about what’s fair, and everyone deserves to feel safe and respected.
  2. Introduce Kindness Toward Others: Reinforce that we should treat others kindly, even if we don’t fully understand their situation.
  3. Modeling Calmness: If they sense you’re worried, reassure them that your family is safe and that adults work to make things better for everyone.

Early Elementary (Ages 6–8): Introducing Concepts of Rights and Respect for Others

Young children in elementary school are starting to grasp the idea of fairness and empathy. This is a good time to introduce simple discussions about rights and respect.

Key Talking Points

  1. Discussing Basic Rights: Explain that sometimes people want to make decisions about their own lives and bodies, and it’s important for everyone to feel safe making those decisions.
  2. Understanding Empathy and Safety: If your child hears about someone feeling afraid or unsafe, explain that everyone deserves to feel protected and accepted.
  3. Setting an Example: If a family member or neighbor has a different opinion, model respect by listening calmly. Explain to your son, “Sometimes people see things differently, and we can still set boundaries with them while being kind and respectful.”

Tweens (Ages 9–12): Developing Awareness of Autonomy, Fairness, and Empathy

Tweens are ready to start discussing more detailed concepts around autonomy, social justice, and empathy. They may be hearing about issues like reproductive rights, LGBTQ rights, and immigration at school or online.

Key Talking Points

  1. Explaining Autonomy and Rights: Share that everyone has the right to make choices about their own lives. You might say, “People disagree about some of these choices, but we believe that it’s important for everyone to feel safe and respected.”
  2. Developing Empathy for Others: Encourage your son to think about how other people might feel in times of uncertainty. “Imagine how you’d feel if you didn’t feel safe being yourself or making decisions about your own life.”
  3. Respecting Boundaries: Explain that they don’t need to engage in conversations that make them feel uncomfortable. You can suggest saying, “I feel differently, but I don’t want to discuss this with you right now. Please respect my boundary.” This reinforces that it’s okay to stand firm without arguing.

Teens (Ages 13–18): Understanding Reproductive Rights, LGBTQ Rights, Immigration, and Showing Support

Teen boys are at an age where they’re able to understand complex social issues, including the challenges facing women, LGBTQ individuals, and immigrants. This is also an important time to educate young men about the impact of reproductive rights on the lives of women and girls, and to foster empathy so they can be thoughtful allies.

Key Talking Points for Teens

Understanding the Impact of Reproductive Healthcare Rights on Women and Girls

  • Explain the Realities: Start by discussing the consequences of restricted reproductive healthcare, especially the challenges facing girls and women regarding unplanned or even planned pregnancies in states with limited or no abortion access. “Right now, in many places, women don’t have the same options they used to when it comes to pregnancy, and this has created a lot of fear and stress for girls and women.”
  • Discuss the Responsibility of Safe Sexual Choices: Emphasize that with restrictions on abortion, decisions around sex carry new weight. Talk about the importance of safe sexual practices, such as using condoms and understanding the risks involved. You might say, “If you’re considering having sex, it’s essential to think carefully about what that means for both you and your partner, especially in states where abortion is no longer available. Using contraception responsibly or even choosing to wait are both ways to honor that responsibility.”
  • Respecting Boundaries and Choices: Encourage your son to have open and respectful conversations with any partner about choices and boundaries, stressing that both people should feel comfortable and safe. “Part of being responsible is making sure your partner feels safe and supported in any decision you both make.”

Understanding the Fears of Girls and Women

  • Encourage Empathy: Help your son consider how girls his age might feel in this environment. “Imagine being a young woman who knows that, if she were to face an unplanned pregnancy, her options would be very limited. That’s a scary reality for many girls, and showing empathy for what they’re feeling is important.”
  • Listen and Offer Support: Encourage him to be a good listener for the women and girls in his life. “Sometimes, the best way to show support is by listening without judgment and letting others know you’re there for them. This can mean a lot, especially when people are feeling vulnerable or worried.”

Showing Understanding Toward LGBTQ Individuals

  • Acknowledge LGBTQ Rights in Limbo: Explain that current discussions are causing concern for LGBTQ individuals who may feel their rights or safety are threatened. “Some LGBTQ people worry about losing certain rights or feeling accepted. Understanding that they may feel anxious or unsafe is a big step in showing support.”
  • Be a Respectful Ally: Encourage him to show respect and kindness toward LGBTQ friends or family members and to avoid language or behaviors that may make others feel uncomfortable. “Being a supportive friend means creating an environment where everyone feels safe to be themselves.”

Understanding the Uncertainty Facing Immigrants

  • Explain Immigrant Rights and Family Safety: Discuss how changes in immigration policy can make families feel uncertain or unsafe, especially if loved ones are affected. “For some families, immigration changes bring real fears about separation or the ability to stay together. This can cause a lot of stress and fear.”
  • Encourage Compassion: Help him think about what it would feel like to face uncertainty about where he lives. “Imagine if you were unsure about whether you could stay in the place you call home. Showing compassion for immigrants and their experiences helps make them feel valued and understood.”

How He Can Be Supportive to Women and Girls

  • Show Empathy and Active Listening: Teach your son that one of the best ways to support others is by listening to their experiences and concerns without judgment. “When someone close to you shares their worries, listen carefully and show that you care. This helps them feel heard and valued.”
  • Respect the Rights and Voices of Women and Girls: Explain the importance of respecting the autonomy and voices of the women in his life, from family members to friends. “Girls and women may feel anxious right now about their rights and safety. By respecting their voices and showing empathy, you’re helping create a supportive environment.”
  • Offer Encouragement and Be Present: Sometimes, just being present and offering a kind word can make a huge difference. “Let the women in your life know you’re there for them. A simple, ‘I’m here if you need to talk,’ goes a long way in showing support.”

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Setting Boundaries

  • Choosing When to Engage: Encourage your teen to decide when a conversation is worth having and when it’s better to disengage respectfully. Remind them that it’s okay to prioritize their comfort and safety in any interaction.
  • Setting Boundaries Without Conflict: Help your teen understand that they can hold boundaries calmly without engaging in arguments. Encourage them to say, “I feel differently, but I don’t want to discuss this with you right now. Please respect my boundary.” This gives them control over the conversation without escalating tensions.

Final Thoughts

Helping your son understand the weight of these issues and the role he can play as a respectful, supportive ally is essential. These conversations not only teach him empathy and responsibility but also prepare him to be a compassionate and informed individual in a rapidly changing world. Encourage him to think deeply, make respectful choices, and be an advocate for fairness and kindness in all of his interactions. This guidance helps him grow into a young man who values and respects the experiences and rights of those around him.

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